HELP, THEY NICKED CINDERELLA!

Literally, bawled my eyes out. I did. The very first time I watched The Champ. Story was just spot on. Champion trying to gain back his title after a lay-off from the ring several years earlier so he could give his son, TJ, a better life and keep him from the stinking rich claws of his ex-wife and her husband. Burning train had a similar effect on me and another film (for the life of me, I cannot remember its name). I was just lost in those stories. Completely. Some people call it - suspension of disbelief. I choose to call it the ‘Cinderella element’. Problem is, I think mine’s been nicked.

I was at the cinema on Sunday. It was St. Valentine’s Day. No, the name of the movie was. It just happened to be the 14th of February. 2 girls; 2 boys. No strings attached. Just 4 friends sat next to each other ready to watch a movie. I assumed my film watching 'candour', which is: ‘Hollywood: the machinery’, “what do they have to say this time?” The film screened. We watched. It ended. The credits were rolling now. It was ok. Okay, almost ok. I mean, at least the producers had done a good job keeping me on my seat through to its very end. So it was alright. At least so I thought until I realised one of us was in tears. “Sweet Lord!” First question that ran through my head, subconsciously, was “did we just see the same movie?” I had felt absolutely nothing! If anything at all, I found some bits hilarious – ‘ribs intact’ hilarious. What made it even more puzzling for me was that everyone else felt the same way. Touched, that is; at least somewhat. Gosh! Is there something wrong somewhere? How come I saw things from a different perspective? Is it that I am warped? Cynical? Desensitized? Am I that emotionally detached that I no longer have the ability to feel like others do? Or is it just because I am male? (Ooh! Where is google when you need it?)

I wasn’t really worried about this. I just pondered. In fact, it amused me a little. After much thought, I concluded that ‘Life’ happened in between when I saw The Champ as an 8 year-old and last week’s St. Valentine’s (No pun intended). I would say I have probably lost my Cinderella element. The ability to get caught up in another world, made up to suspend a big chunk of your logical reasoning ability. A world in which a love sick 7 year-old can hop on a bike, cycle for miles in morbid traffic, to hold a rose up to his teacher, earnestly asking her to be his valentine, and a normal conversation ensues; one in which love messages get sent in a bottle and the sea becomes the US postal service. It really is amazing. It always has been. The thing is, I think I have stopped believing.

On the way home, I had a chat with my friend about it. The discussion was about emotions and the different ways men and women dealt with theirs. I mentioned I couldn’t cry at movies or in certain other situations. She said its probably pride, I thought Not, It went on and on. Now that was a long conversation and I don’t think I was able to make head or tail of it. Anyway, the truth is that I would really love to be as emotionally connected as they were, but I think that just like Father Christmas, the tooth fairy and goblins got erased from my reality, so did Hollywood and all its emotional accessories. So much so, that these days, whenever at the movies, I just happen to always have my Paramount Pictures proof vest on. Now, it has become almost impossible to take off.

Help!